Welcome To The Waiting Place

SPEAKER_00 0:00

This is Between the Prayer and the Promise, a faith-centered podcast for anyone who's ever found themselves waiting on God. You've prayed, you've believed, you've stood on his word, and yet you're still waiting. Still trusting, still holding on to what he's promised, even when you can't see it yet. We gather here once a month to share real stories from real people, navigating that sacred and sometimes lonely space between what we've asked God for and what we're still believing him to do. This is a place for honest faith. The kind that admits God, that wrestles with that delay. But in spite of all that, we still choose to trust. Because here's the truth. The waiting is not wasted. God is faithful in every season, especially the ones that test us the most. So if you're listening and you're in that in-between season and you're holding on by a thread of faith, know this. You are not forgotten, and you are not alone. Welcome. Let's trust him together right here between the prayer and the promise.

Alive On Purpose

SPEAKER_00 1:27

What if I told you you are still alive on purpose? Not by accident, not by luck, not just because you made it through, but because God kept you. Some of you are listening right now, you survived something you don't even talk about. Something that should have taken you out. Something that almost broke you. Something that changed you. And if you were honest, you've even asked the question, why am I still here? Because survival, it wasn't the end of your story. Sometimes it was the beginning of your assignment.

Meet Dr Andrea Niestas

SPEAKER_00 2:24

Welcome back to Between the Prayer and Promise. This is a space where we talk about what God is doing in us while we're waiting on what He promised to us. And today's guest knows exactly what it means to face death and choose life again and again. Dr. Andrea Fiesta is a clinical psychologist with over 25 years in behavioral health, who has spent years helping people navigate their mental health and emotional well-being. She has served in leadership, she has mentored others, and she has developed programs that have impacted continuous and countless lives, right? And now she is a wellness coach. She's a speaker, and she helps individuals who are going through life. But guess what? They're just going through life. We're not fulfilled. She's also a passionate advocate for mental health awareness and suicide prevention. And she carries a message rooted in kindness, courage, and hope. But beyond the degrees, beyond the titles, guess what? She's a survivor! She's a survivor. Y'all get ready. This lady here, she spent 101 days in the hospital. She faced death not once, but three times y'all, and yet she is still here. She's still here. I can't even imagine the strength it takes to walk through a season of life like that and decide to tell her story. And guess what? She's not just telling her story, she's telling others that they can hear too. Andrea? Hi. Welcome, welcome. Thank you. Welcome to Between the Prayer and the Promise. And thank you. Maybe I you know what? I always want to make sure that I honor people's name. Dr. Andrea, please say your name. I want to make sure I said it correctly. Andrea Niestas. Niestas. Welcome, Dr. Andrea Niestas. Thank you for being our honored guest here. And thank you so much for sharing your story. I know that someone is, I already know someone's going to be blessed because I'm already blessed, just you know, reading and hearing about your story before. And I was like, I'm so excited to have you on here and for people to really learn about you and just to dig deep into your story. So, you know, I like to go right in.

Collapse And Septic Shock Reality

SPEAKER_00 5:17

So take us back right away when you were hospitalized for 101 days and you almost died, not once, but three times. Take us back to that moment when you realize that this was serious and you might not make it. What was going through your mind emotionally and spiritually?

SPEAKER_01 5:36

Well, it's really such a long story, but I was initially sick for a few months before any doctors would help me. I mean, really help me and figure out what was wrong. So I was at home hardly even able to walk, just taking a few steps. I was completely out of breath. I didn't even have enough strength to stand up from the couch. My husband had to help me stand up. So I would go to bed afraid sometimes that I wasn't going to wake up, just because I knew something was wrong, even though they weren't helping me. So what happened was I actually got a job out of town that I had to go out of town one day a week. So one day my husband said, You can't go, you're too sick. You should tell him that you're not available. You know, you'll you'll go next time. But I ended up saying, I have to go. You know, this is my job. I need to, I need to make it work. So I went. And finally, at that point, Lanise, after being ill for a couple of months, I finally collapsed in the hotel as we were checking in for my job the next day. And they finally called 911. And so I ended up in the hospital. And still at that point, I was still not even aware of how serious it was. So they did admit me. And it took about a week and a half before they still even could figure out what was wrong with me. But during that hospitalization, I was on so much medication. They did know that I was in septic shock. And so it really was that first week of hospitalization that I started realizing how ill I was. I was getting blood transfusions because I was so weak. And so that moment at the point that I was in the hospital and still having so many uh medical issues and them not being able to find out immediately what was wrong with me, that's when I knew that it was bad. And part of my illness because of the medication or because of the infection, I was having a lot of dreams slash hallucinations. I don't even really understand what was going on. But I did have a dream where I thought the staff was trying to kill me. And so from then forward, I was afraid of even being there. So they were trying to help me, but I was afraid I wanted to go home because I thought that they were trying to hurt me. So it really was that point that I was in the hospital when I understood just how serious it was.

SPEAKER_00 8:32

So while you were in the hospital and you were going through there, so when did you find out like that you almost died? Like three times? Was this, did you find this out later? Did your husband tell you like? And did you like have like a you know how some people say, Well, I was in between eternity and earth? Did you have that kind of experience? Or what all happened?

SPEAKER_01 8:53

I did have one strange experience. So while this is still in that first uh first about week and a half. So I was first admitted onto the medical floor as they were doing tests and trying to figure out what was going on. At one point, because I was so afraid and wanted to go home, I was starting to really panic. And so at one point I was starting to have a panic attack. And I told the staff, I have to go home, I want to go home, I can't be here anymore. By that point, I was already almost, I really wasn't even able to walk because I was so bedbound, because I was so sedated, I wasn't getting out of bed, I couldn't even get up anymore out of the bed, but I was really frantic saying, I have to go home, I have to go home. So they actually gave me Adivan so that I could calm down. So when they gave that to me and the medication was kicking in, at that point, I really thought that I was dying. I was certain that I was not gonna wake up the next day. So that was not one of the times where I actually did almost die, but I really was truly had accepted that I was gonna die. I just knew it. And because the medication was sort of taking its effect, that's when I was feeling that way. And so then, you know, just heavily medicated, I'm thinking, wow, so this is what it's like when someone is dying. And I started thinking about heaven and what everything meant. And I said, okay, well, I'm just trying to think like how, you know, what's next? And then I started becoming afraid, saying, Well, what if there is no heaven? What if I what if this really is it? And then I started thinking, well, what if there is a heaven? And now I'm not going because I'm not being, I'm not believing, I'm afraid. And so my mind was just going and going about what everything meant. And, you know, if I think that there maybe isn't, what am I, what if I end up not going there? And so it was that was a really difficult situation. And then obviously I woke up the next day, but I was really in a bad state at that point. So eventually they did figure out what was wrong with me, and I had to have emergency surgery.

Coma Waking And Deep Depression

SPEAKER_01 11:15

But right after emergency surgery is when I actually was in a coma for about two weeks. So I remember looking at the calendar. Well, the board, you know, it has the doctor's name, nurse's name, the date, all of that information. I remember looking at the board with the date, and then suddenly I opened my eyes and I looked at the board and it was two weeks later. And I was like, what happened? Like I was just so confused and I was so medicated still at that point. And I think that was the point where I was having these strange dreams and thinking the staff was trying to kill me. So when I woke up, I actually woke up to being on a ventilator, um, having a trach, having a feeding tube, not able to walk because I had been bedbound for so long. Obviously, because of the trach, I couldn't talk. I had tubes everywhere. I had actually had surgery, so I had a wound back, like this huge incision. I had an ostomy bag. And I that first moment that I woke up and realized, I was like I I was just so confused of what was happening. But at that point, I was still so, like I said, medicated that I really didn't quite fully understand what was happening. I knew I was in the hospital, I knew that I had a lot of things going on, but it really that first week of waking up was really just trying to understand what was happening. And I was trying to communicate with the staff, but because I couldn't talk, my family had brought me a board, so I had a board with a marker, but I still couldn't even really write that well. So I was really having a hard time communicating with every form. They were trying to get me to point to letters, but my hands were so shaky. I was really having a hard time being able to communicate. So after about a week of that is really when I was able to fully process what was happening to me. And then that's when I started falling into the depths of depression. When I was being able to see more clearly. And I never thought, why me? Because I know a lot of people think that, but I what I would think was why did I survive for this?

SPEAKER_00 13:41

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 13:42

Everything that's happening. Why am I even here? Why did I get saved? Why do I have to be here with all of this going on with me? And so that was that was my thinking at that time. So I was really feeling bad at that point. And I was mostly what I was mostly scared of was the ventilator. Because I knew if I couldn't get off the ventilator, then I wasn't going to survive. So I was really, really scared of that. That's what I was scared of the most. And every time they had to take me out for like a CT scan or something, they would have to change me to a portable ventilator. And I had a harder time breathing on those, and I would get, I was just so anxious. And so when I felt that I couldn't breathe, I would panic, and then I really couldn't breathe, and it was just like a horrible cycle.

SPEAKER_00 14:46

Wow.

A Host’s Close Call Wake Up

SPEAKER_00 14:47

You said so much there. I just it kind of takes me back. I think about a time when it wasn't actually that long ago where I was in a similar situation when I had to be well, I wasn't I was rushed to the hospital by my mom. Actually, I I I was staying above in the duplex over my mom and was just sweating, and I just could not stop sweating, and I just felt like something was really, really wrong with me. And so I went downstairs and I was like, mom, I think I need to go to the emergency, something is wrong. And so she rushed me to the hospital, and they hurried up and took me back, and all of a sudden, like when I got back there, all of these people rushed in and I knew I knew it wasn't good. And so, like, what goes through your mind in that moment? At first, I was thinking about all the natural things. I was like, Oh, I need to, I literally was thinking, I need to tell someone to call my boss because I need to make sure that people know I'm not gonna be at work today. I need to let my staff know. I was thinking about like kernel things, but then the next thought was when they couldn't get my heart rate down, it was going so so fast. I started thinking, like, I might die today. And they were like, then they told me they were like, we're gonna try to stop your heart. And they told me all the stuff they were gonna have to do. And I literally, and when I had passed out and I came back, I literally was like, I might not, I might not live. And so it was like one of the scariest moments of my life, and like even thinking about it now, it is so terrifying. And you know, the scripture that comes to mind, what profits a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul? Like, even thinking about all the things and all the things you work towards, right? Like, is it even worth it? If have I done enough, and am I am I gonna make it into heaven? Right? Did I do I'm thinking about all these other things, but I need to be thinking about myself right now. I need to be thinking about other things, and so it's like in that moment, and then I was like, oh my gosh. And then I started thinking about my family and just other things, and I was just like, then I started started thinking about Lord, forgive me, forgive me, you know, for all the the things that I've done, you know, and then the little things, and so just, but then I was like later, once I knew I was gonna be okay, I was like, let me have that same heart every single day. Every day, not just in a moment of a crisis, right? When I'm like, I might not live, but let me have that heart every day as I move forward. And so to the listeners, I don't want us to get to that to that point when we are on our bed where we don't know where if we will live or not. We should have that heart. Have I done enough? Am I living with a humble heart? Like, Lord, is this is this, am I showing up the way that you want me to show up? So you definitely survived, and you said you didn't ask why, right? You didn't really go into that mode, but you know that you survived for a reason. But you obviously were the strong one. But everything

When Survival Becomes The Lesson

SPEAKER_00 18:17

kind of shifts. Let's talk about what it feels like to survive when survival becomes the lesson itself. So you sit across like people, right, all the time as a psychologist for 25 years listening to their pain and the things that they're going through, but suddenly now you were the one in the bed. You were the one with the monitors on, and and people were praying for you and things of that nature. And was there anything in you that broke that you that your psychology degree couldn't fix? Is there something that you learned about yourself or your mindset as you were in that position that surprised you?

SPEAKER_01 18:59

Well, so by this point, I was in the hospital for about a month. And that my three experiences of almost dying had already happened, but I didn't even understand, I didn't know. My husband just kept telling me when I kept saying what's what's going on, because I had all of this happening, he just kept saying, like, we'll talk about it later, you just rest. And he wanted me to worry about it. But apparently by that point, my head already stopped breathing twice. Then I had an emergency surgery because I had a pulmonary embolism. So I had a blood clot in my lung, and I had a surgery that took two hours. And I actually happened to talk to the nurse who was in that surgery later when I was on the medical floor, and she told me she was in there. She said it took two hours. She said there was so much blood, the doctor and I didn't think that you were gonna make it. So all of that had already happened, and I didn't even know it. The doctor had the conversation with my husband. If anybody wants to come and see her, they need to come now. So they really weren't giving me anything better than a 50-50 percentage at that point because I had was doing so bad. So all of that had already happened and I didn't, I didn't even know. So when eventually I got my phone back and I'm like looking, you know, because I don't have nothing to do. I was just sitting there like scrolling through my phone at one point, and I had seen that my siblings had posted something on Facebook, and I was I got annoyed because I was like, why are they sharing my business on Facebook for everyone else to know? But I didn't even understand how serious it was that what had happened. I knew that I was in a serious situation with everything going on, but I, because I was in the coma, didn't even realize everything that had happened, and nobody was really wanting to tell me because they didn't want me to get upset and worry about it while I was trying to get better. At that point, I had so many infections. I had pneumonia, I was on antibiotics, I was on steroids. I would get better, and then two days later, the doctor would say, Your labs show that you have another infection, so we need to put you back on a different medication. So it was just this cycle, it just felt like it was never ending. And at this point, I had been there for at least a month, and I was like, How long am I gonna be here? So when I was to to try to answer your question when I was in that state where I was thinking, why am I here? Why did I survive for all of this that's going on for me? Um that's when I really was feeling so not just depressed, but I just was so dejected. Dejected things. Thinking that nothing is ever gonna get better. I can't move. I I literally my legs like I had no control. I couldn't even move my toes. I couldn't pick up my leg. I could barely move my arms. I couldn't even turn from one side to the other. Like literally, my first when I started physical therapy, my first goals were to wiggle my toes and try to actually roll myself over from one side of the bed to the other. So what I was feeling at that point was just that things were never going to get better. The nurses would come in and say, Do you want to watch TV? And I would say no. I literally would sit there staring at the wall all day. Because my family, because I was out of town, I was actually four and a half hours away from my family. So a lot of times I didn't have anyone there. They would try to rotate and take time off work so that one or two of them were there whenever possible, but there were times that none of them were there. And I would go days alone without seeing them or without seeing anyone I knew but the staff who I thought was trying to kill me. You know, so it was just this, it was probably at least a full week of feeling like that my life was over and just being so far down in the hole in the depths of depression that I couldn't even get myself out of it. And so it was so bad that at one point, because I was like I said, I was really scared about the ventilator. That was like my biggest nemesis of what everything that was going on. And so because I was just feeling so bad, at one point I finally said, after about a week of this, I finally said, I can't do this anymore. I have to get better. If I don't get off that ventilator, I am not going to survive. And I knew in that moment to go back to your question of everything that I knew about psychology and everything of helping other people, and you know, everything I learned from books and school and everything, life experience. I knew that the best way to get myself physically better and off that ventilator was to get myself emotionally better because I knew if I stayed in that in that state of depression, that my body was not going to be able to heal as well. I just I knew it. I knew that's what the case was. And so at that point, I

Grace Gratitude And Giving

SPEAKER_01 24:41

made a decision. I said, I have to get better. And the only way I can do that is to make sure that I get through this emotional part. And so what I decided to do at that moment was to be grateful. Well, there's two things. One is that I realized that I was only here, like you said in the beginning, I was only here literally by the grace of God. There was no other reason because of everything that happened. I mean, when I discharged from the hospital, it literally, I got copies of my medical record, a whole page, a whole page from top to bottom were all the diagnoses that I had while I was in the hospital, including pneumonia, pulmonary embolism, you know, respiratory distress, like a whole page of all the diagnosis and issues that I had while I was in the hospital. And so what I decided was that I knew I was only here because God saved me for some reason that I didn't know yet, but I knew that the reason was something related to helping people. So that I knew. And number two, I knew that the best way for me to get out of this hole was to start being grateful for the things that I did have. So instead of thinking about everything I lost, that I can't walk, that I can't talk, I can't breathe on my own. I'm not, I couldn't even eat at that point. I was still on a feeding tube. I had lost so much weight, they were like, they were starting to get really concerned because of all the weight that I had lost because I was on the feeding tube for so long. So instead of thinking of all that, I decided to be grateful for what I did have. And so what I did have was I did still have my physical body. And I tried to think about, I didn't even really think about how I could get better and how things could be better down the road. I wanted to simply focus on what it is that I could be grateful for today. So still being alive was number one. Number two, the fact when I would think about why am I still in the hospital? Because at this point I've been there about a month and a half. I would think, why am I still here? I can't go home. Everybody's so far away. How much longer am I going to be here? So I started, I decided not to think about any of that and instead say, I am grateful for the fact that I'm here because now I have doctors and nurses who are trying to help me. Because when I was back home, they didn't try to figure out what was wrong with me. They were shifting me off to other people and saying, There's nothing we can do, go see this person. There's nothing we can do, go see this person. So I actually had medical staff that was trying to help me as opposed to people just pushing me off and not doing anything. So all of what I had wrong with me, I decided not to focus on that and instead focus on the fact that I was still there, which was a good thing because it meant they were trying to make me better. And they weren't just trying to shit me off and send me away. So instead of thinking I can't move my legs, I was grateful for the fact that I had my legs. And someday they may work again and someday they may not. But the fact that I could possibly someday walk again, I was grateful for that. And so every single one of those things I had to change my mindset for. And I said, I have to do this because I need to be emotionally well so that that'll help me be more physically well. Because that whole hopelessness and helplessness and things are never going to get better. Things were never going to get better if that's how I kept my mindset. And so that was my big shift in deciding grace, gratitude, and now giving is what I talk about when I talk about this story. So focusing on the grace that I received, and now it's time for me to practice grace towards other people. And I had to practice grace towards myself because even though I made that decision and I started getting better, I had bad days. I had a lot of bad days. I still have bad days now. So I have to remember to give myself grace and practice grace towards other people and continue to practice gratitude because that is one of my big messages to people is that just like you said, I have to wake up every day and remember what I'm grateful for. Not just when it's bad, not just when I'm sick, not just when I'm almost gonna die, but every single day. Because if I don't practice that gratitude every single day, then I'm just gonna end it back there again in that mindset. So we have to remember that daily so we don't take things for granted because it's so easy to just fall right back into that. And now the giving part is I feel like that is my new journey. My new journey is, and and I was I felt like I did a lot of you know, gratitude and giving before, but now I just feel like it's so amplified. And so now giving and doing for other people is what my new path is, and that's the only reason why I'm here, and so every day I have to do something to give or do for other people because that's the only reason why I survived, I think.

SPEAKER_00 30:31

So that's really good because this podcast is really for those that are in that in-between stage. It's like we trust God, we know God can do something, but when you're in that middle part, it's like you don't see the end, right? Yeah, he's doing it for other people, but I don't see the end. So someone could be ill, they could be sick, they could be going through right now, but I'm in the hospital, I don't see the end. And so it sounds like the shift for you was just a mindset. You just decided that, okay, I'm here, and you just made up in your mind to change your mind. Is that all that happened? Or was there a song? Was there a scripture? Was there anything else that motivated you, or was it really just your mindset had to shift? And when your mind shifts, your mouth shifted, and everything lined up to what your mind decided to shift to.

SPEAKER_01 31:24

It was having that recognition that I'm only alive by God's grace. So whether that came to me on its own, whether it was the message that was given to me, it was you were only here by God's grace, period. And so accepting that and realizing that was made that gratitude so easy. Like if I'm only here because he wanted me to be here, then I need to get my butt in gear and I need to stop feeling sorry for myself, and I need to stop making things worse, and I need to make sure that I get better because if he is giving me, like he said, an assignment, then I need to make sure that that happens. And the only way I can make that happen is to get myself physically well first so that I can do whatever it is that I'm meant to do now.

SPEAKER_00 32:21

Wonderful.

Where Faith Meets Therapy

SPEAKER_00 32:23

So I have one, I have a few other questions, but this question for you is about faith and psychology because sometimes they don't always speak the same language, and you kind of live where they both meet, right? So you're in a unique position, you understand the psychology side of trauma, and you've experienced, you know, surviving, and you you, you know, you you're a woman of faith as well. How do you explain what therapy can't touch and what only God can heal?

SPEAKER_01 33:01

So that's a good question. I think that part of it is that I I don't know what word exactly to use besides that either intuition or just being more open to receiving messages, you know, because we all get messages all the time and we don't pay attention to them, you know. So I think just being more open to when things are hard, sometimes I get a feeling of like it's gonna be okay, you know, and I start feeling better because I feel like somehow it's gonna be okay. I don't know how yet, but it's gonna work out, and so being able to be open to that intuition slash message, slash, you know, something that that I'm receiving, being able to be open to that so that I can accept it and then integrate it into my life and know that either, like I said, something's gonna be okay, or this is the next thing I have to do, you know. And so one of those things is just this actually starting, it came to me one day, like, you know, huh? How what can I do to share this story or to be able to broadcast this out more to people? Oh, well, what about podcasts? And it's like, well, where did that come from? You know, just something that I thought of, or again, is that a message? So just being open to those thoughts and those messages that you're getting and knowing that they're going to align with whatever path I'm supposed to be on, and then being able to follow through with those.

SPEAKER_00 34:53

Right. That that leads me in. I asked that because it led me into my other question, which is you obviously you survive for a reason, right? So do you feel like or do you know what that reason is and how God has guided you into your path since surviving?

The Hard In Between Afterward

SPEAKER_01 35:17

Well, I think that leads to the in-between place that you're talking about because I got out of the hospital in December of 2024. In April of 2026, I literally just had my last surgery. I mean, I had even after getting out of the hospital, I had four more surgeries. The last one was unexpected. My last surgery was supposed to be September, but then I had to have another one just last month. So that in-between place for me is that because I I've had these continuous surgeries and I may be doing better, but then I have a surgery, so then I have to recover from that surgery. And so I haven't been able to work full time. And so I've in I was in between that stage of like I was trying to apply for jobs, thinking like, oh, I should be done with my surgeries in September, but then I had another surgery. So being able to find a job and make a living with this message and path that I'm on, I haven't been able to quite put those two together yet. So now that I just have my last surgery, you know, well, when I had my last surgery in September, I'm like, okay, this is it. I'm gonna get a job, I'm gonna get like, you know, on my path, I'm gonna be doing what I need to be doing. And then, oh, guess what? Now I have to have another surgery. So, in that, being in that between stage has been really hard because, you know, I I've been doing some things on the side, like a lot of speaking and workshops, but being able to like really build my business has been hard because I have to take the time off, or you know, and so I thought, well, maybe I could get a part-time job or another job because I was teaching. I was teaching at the college, I was a psychology professor, but then of course, when I got hospitalized, I had to drop all those classes and now I'm adjunct and they don't really have any room for me right now. So, you know, trying to like be patient and hoping that you know, I can get some classes to do the college again, or I can get another job in the meantime, or being able to build a business when I really can't be there full time because of everything that's going on. So, in that in-between stage, it's been frustrating, you know, and feeling like, okay, I'm here for a reason. This is what I'm supposed to be doing is helping people and sharing my story and talking about, you know, grace, gratitude, and giving and helping other people feel more fulfilled in their lives, but like, how can I do it when I can't work? Or I put in job applications and nobody calls me back, you know, so it is frustrating. And there are times where I feel like, you know, what else do I need to do? Like, what am I doing wrong? Like, what how much longer before I actually get on track and do what I'm really supposed to be doing? And how can I do that? How can I do that, Lord, when I don't have a job, you know, to be able to live and not be late on bills and you know, all of that stuff. So that's been really hard. That's been really difficult to stay, like you said, to stay on paths, to stay motivated. But I know that I have to have faith and I have to know that it's gonna get there when it's gonna get there. It it's just it is hard to be patient though.

SPEAKER_00 38:54

And thank you for being sharing and being transparent because I think that's so important too, as you are in your in-between stages, because sometimes people just want to hear the oh, I made it, but we have to hear the I'm making it, I'm showing up. This is how it looks to show up as I'm in the in-between stages, as I'm like this podcast all came because I was in between. That's why this podcast was even created because I was like, Lord, I need encouragement. How do I keep moving on? How do I keep showing up? I need to know, you know, how do people do it? What are some methods that our people are using, you know? And so that's why this space was created because the transparency is needed. And I know that God is real, I know that he shows up, and I know that he is no respecter of per person, you know. And so I encourage the listeners to keep showing up, keep trusting him. He says, if you seek me, you will find me, right? And so I definitely believe that. And so I think too, especially when people survive, it's that question, now what?

Survivor’s Guilt And Self Grace

SPEAKER_00 40:08

And I think you kind of answered that. You show up, right? Now what? And how do you not carry the guilt, right? That's a whole nother thing. How do you not carry the guilt of surviving? Because I think you become a different person, right? After that, you know what?

SPEAKER_01 40:25

Yeah, and I think that's part of, I mean, but like what you said before, that's part of the trauma is the survivor's guilt, because you know, there's people that I've known that I've passed since I, you know, since I've gotten sick. Like I there was someone in our extended family who passed away who was like in his 30s. I had a friend who passed away who was, you know, in like early 50s. And so when I see this, I'm like, why? Like, why did I survive and they didn't? With, you know, he was he was actually a pastor, you know, he was a servant of God. You know, the other individual was so young in his 30s. Like, how, like, how is this justified that I would live? And in the other individuals do not, you know, so it really was like it was really hard, you know, and sometimes sometimes that really kind of it I really take it hard sometimes when I hear stories of people that I knew who passed, and I'm like, I I don't I don't understand how I survived and why I survived, and someone like that didn't. So it it really is that it really is a real thing, survivor's guilt. And feeling, you know, like when they say imposter syndrome, you know, it's like why? I'm I'm here trying to share my story and trying to inspire people, but I I feel like I don't deserve it. Like, you know, why should I be here when those people aren't? So it really does play emotional games on your mind.

SPEAKER_00 42:10

Well, what would you say to encourage to a person who is grateful to be alive, but they're secretly maybe their disappointment with the disappointed in their life? Like they're alive, but they're not living with intention. Maybe they have survivor's regret or whatever is going on. How would you encourage them?

SPEAKER_01 42:32

Well, I have days like that too. I have days where I tell my husband, I don't, you know, I'm doing, I feel like I'm doing everything I can. I feel like I'm doing everything that I'm supposed to, but I'm still not at a full place in my life where I'm like as back to normal as I could be, you know. I I'm never gonna be back to normal 100% to what I was before physically. I'm definitely not the same person I was before. Even my personality and how I feel and how I do things is completely I'm I'm just a completely different person now. So, but there are days when I do feel like where it really is hard. And so, really, you know, talking to my husband, he really is probably the only one that I talk to about it like in depth. And he says it you can't take it to heart, you know, you they had a path and you have a path, and what you are doing or are meant to do was nothing has nothing to do with their path and what they were meant to do. And so you can't think about it because it's you know, like one has nothing to do with the other. And you just have to focus still on what you do have and what you can make of your life, you know, not and how I how I hear that is not put it to waste. You know, if I sit here starting to feel that guilt or starting to feel like I don't deserve to be here, then that is going to discourage me from doing what I need to do and staying on a path. So those are the things that I kind of, you know, I have to tell myself like if I end up feeling guilty or feeling bad or feeling like I don't deserve the second chance, then that's going to get me out of that mindset of what I have to do. And it's going to just be a waste. I can't waste the second chance that I have because I'm again feeling sorry for myself. You know, I I can feel bad, I can feel those emotions, I can be in those emotions, but I can't stay there. You know, I I some of it is explainable that somebody would feel that way. And so you can feel it and you can be there, but you can't stay in it because it's really gonna just detract you from what you need to be doing. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 45:14

So good. So is there anything else about your story? Anything else before you share with everyone how they can connect with you that you would like to share with everyone that you didn't get a chance, or any question that I didn't ask you that you would like to share with everyone that you didn't get a chance yet to share with the people?

SPEAKER_01 45:34

What my intention always of sharing my story is that I would want people to not have

Daily Gratitude Without The Crisis

SPEAKER_01 45:43

to go to the kind of experience that I went through, that you went through, to in order to be able to take the nuggets of information that we now incorporated into our lives. So again, that gratitude. And that really is like the first step when I'm talking about changing your mindset is that gratitude. And it's gratitude for little things and it's gratitude for big things. And if people can know that if you can wake up every day and find something to be grateful for, then that's really gonna make it so much easier for you to be able to start appreciating life and not taking things for granted. Just starting with nothing else but being grateful and practicing that gratitude is gonna make such an enormous difference. And if you can take from our stories of what we learned and shifting your mindset and being grateful for things and being able to enhance your life and to feel more fulfilled by doing that without having to deal with the kind of experience that we had is just it's just like free therapy. It's just like free therapy to be able to do that for yourself and be able to make that change and have a new perspective and a new appreciation.

SPEAKER_00 47:15

Wonderful. Thank you. I have truly enjoyed this conversation today. Thank you so much for sharing with the audience your experience and being transparent. Now, how can the people connect with you if they would love to reach you?

SPEAKER_01 47:32

So the best way is my website. It's lifecoaching byandrea.com. But I am on social media, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Life Coaching by Andrea is my name on all of those. And so following me on there or looking at my website, I do workshop speaker, speaker engagements all in person and virtual. So there's definitely something on there that you can find that would be helpful to you.

SPEAKER_00 48:05

All right. Thank you again. We definitely appreciate you so much, and we enjoyed having you here.

Connection Info And Closing Prayer

SPEAKER_00 48:13

Andrea, your story reminds us something so powerful. Not everyone who survives is actually alive, right? Some of us are medically stable, we're professionally functioning, spiritually, we're flatlined. But you remind us that survival without purpose is just like it's a delayed death, basically. God did not keep you here just to take up space. You have an assignment. Even if you're still trying to figure that out, even if you're in the in-between stages, you all, God still has a purpose for you. Keep track, keep moving ahead. If there's someone who is listening, I know you needed to hear this story today. Someone, maybe you're asking, why am I still here? Because you survived, you are not finished yet. It's just your beginning. God is listening, and so as always, I like to close out with prayer. Father, we stand on holy ground right now because someone somewhere is listening. Who shouldn't be? By all medical logic, they should be gone. By statistics, they should have given up. By all circumstances, they should have quit. But God, you kept them. Lord, let this moment be a reminder. Let them feel you speaking through Andrea's story today. You kept them here on purpose. Their survival has an assignment, their pain has a purpose. Their story is not yet over. For the one who's been merely existing, Lord, ooh, please let them know that they have purpose. For the one who has survived, but they feel guilty. Release their calling, Father God. For the one who is tired of being tired, restore their strength, Father God, Lord. Let them know right now, in this moment, that they are not just survivors, they have been chosen, they are needed, they are assigned, Father God, Lord, in the name of Jesus. And we thank you. Amen. Thank you so much. Woo! God is good. As you go from this place, remember this. Your survival story is not just about you. Thank you, Andrea, for sharing your story. God wants to reach people through you. When you're in between a prayer and a promise, your scars can be someone else's roadmap to their healing. Until next time, keep breathing on purpose because you're here for a reason.

Like Subscribe And Keep Trusting

SPEAKER_00 51:18

Thank you so much for listening to Between the Prayer and the Promise. If this episode encouraged you, we love for you to like, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. Your support helps us reach more people who are walking through their own season of waiting. But here's what matters most. Remember to trust God, not just when the answers come, not just when the blessings show up, but right here in the waiting, right here in the silence, right here in the in-between. He is faithful. He sees you and he's working, even when you can't see it yet. Until next time, keep believing, keep trusting, and keep holding on. I'm Lenny Sleeds, and I promise you, God is faithful.